well nigel smsed me today and corrected me.. it wasn't bush who said that. it was sadddam.. shud've known bush was not smart enuff to do that.. but my point still stand! nonetheless.. sorry president bush. but you're still a jackass!

utter stupidity! you have the audacity to issue that rewards list, president bush! 14grand for a dead iraqi soldier who killed a US marine. 28grand if the iraqi soldier is alive! what? do you think this is a game? monopoly? how dare you put prices like that to life! what about those iraqi soldiers killed by your men? suddenly they dun matter? this is not a boardgame! marines and soldiers are following orders. just like your own marine corp! of course they will stand by their leader. it's called commitment and responsibility! besides they dun have any boombazzle against their presidnet. why shud you?

you proclaim your sovereign powers..given by who? GOD? you claim it yourself! who died and gave you the power and authority to evict or put into exile any government or regime that do not strike your fancy? bullshit! truth be told i'm not a fan of saddam hussein. but god help me if i'm going to just keep quiet while you ridiculously throw your weight around!

as i reconsidered my pro-war stance, I resolutely set it in stone at last. I'd never identified with the bush leadership and their self-interested base for their foreign policies. The way Bbsh twists and mangles an asian name like 'Sa-damn Hu-sayyyne' to accomodate his Texan twang is symbolic of how the Americans have bent and twisted the nations they perceived as inferior to suit their own ideas of what democracy and human rights are. Having proved themselves the biggest hypocrites amongst the lot of diplomatic bullshitters, I do not see the rationale of singing the star spangled Banner like an overhyped patriotic onlooker while they claim that they've been wronged.


i believe saddam shud be disarm or whateva it is. but never shud you jeopardize the lives of millions of innocent others! "we have nothing against you iraqis". yeah of course you say that. but you won't be singing the same tune when those missiles and bombs drops on their houses ain't it right? it's bad enough people are dying of diseases like aids and cancer, you dun have to exacerbate the status quo by deliberately killing the others. now who's the one performaing mass-genocide? i believe mr bush, you shud leave the presidency and meet a shrink! you're one hell-o-va sick m-u-t-h-a-f-*-*-*-e-r! and dun you be sitting there smiling at my defence for you, saddam! the moment you trip, it'll be over!

"oh the land of the free
and the home of the brave....
(my big fat ass!)"
~ The Star Spangled Banner (Reprise)

If I'm not quite good enough
Or somehow undeserving of
A mother's love
You could've had the decency to give me hope
Before you gave me lies

Don't you even care
Just the slightest little bit for me
Cause I really need to feel you care
Even once upon a time for me

I need to believe
In my heart of hearts of hearts you cared for me
I need to understand
Why you left me there so helplessly


~moved on~

weidong woke me up today! called me at 11.45 in the morning! can you believe that!? who in the right mind wakes up so early on a non-school day?? haha. oh well. i dunno if i want to go to the airport to do the gothic presentation.. sigh. i'll call him later. maybe go at 2 or 3. anyway. came downstairs to find both my TVs (in the family room and kitchen/dining room) turned on and tuned to cnn and channel news asia respectively. argh! enuff oredi! i can't stand it. everyone's so caught uop with the war. we got alot of other things to do in this world you knoe! like studying for the freaking common tests that starts this coming monday! i dunno, i guess my ignorance or just lack of interest is due to the fact that the war is so far away. why get cauhgt with the frenzy. doesn't affect us directly in any way. ok maybe economically. but it doesn't change the fact that we've gotta study, go to work. put food on the table. and if everything goes well. get a degree for a job!

i' m so dead tired. i dunno why. didn't have the mood to do anything at all.. i just wasted half a day sleeping and waking up late! what the hell.. i gotta finish my econs soon. paper's on monday morning! sigh! at least i dun really have to study for lit. still must study but not as hard as how i'm trying to mug for history and econs. i need to get out of this wretched competition bearing world!

oh. delta goodrem. remember her name. she's this gorgeous girl from the aussie show neighbours. another soap actress-turned-singer yup. after, kylie, natalie, danii, holly, jason and who ever else is famous from aussieland! but she's got a nice voice and her first single sounds good.. a top 40 ballad entitled born to try. at this moment tho', i'm fixated by this slow number sang by amanda perez called angel. eard it before? somehow, the song's just sorta hit you rite in the core of your heart and emotions. well, whattado, i've a soft spot for such mushy sentimental numbers. haha.. but really. v nice song.

got a letter from the government telling me to register for my freaking national service! argh. amidst all the reluctance and averseness, i'm rather excited about entering ns. not that i'm all yipee-yaya-yipee-yo about having military training so that i could serve this hell hole in times of war. no. just that it's something new and foreign to me. sure being in SJI's military band was as good as being in bmt for a month but this is the real thing! i'm growing up.. taking the next step towards my manhood.(geez that sounds crude when taken out of context!) i'm venturing into a jungle of alien surroundings and ocean-wide of suprises. plus i get to hold guns! i tink! haha..

"God send me an angel
From the heavens above
Send me an angel to heal my broken heart"
~ Amanda Perez

i'm back! haha.. touched down last night at 1 am! what the hell.. was dead tired.. didn't sleep till 3. woke up around ten and went to meet purplez, baby puff and dong at the airport to study. wasn't that productive, but i did finish market failure.

the feeling of peace and serenity is something i will always miss. coming home, tho hppy, i dun feel excited. i missed the slow-pacing life of aussieland. having grown up in an urban and fast paced environment, i's gradually jaded by the competitve nature of my surroundings. granted that competitions are always good to ensure that you improve yourself and so will not be left behind by the ever-changing world. but i'm tired! sick of all the chase for worldly matters. whoa! sounding lyk i'm gonna be a monk! haha.. nah, nothing of that sorts. just that i feel that i need time to be with myself. feel and understand what life is about. i dun claim to actually find out what my mission in life is from my trip. but at least i had time to myself to think about ME! perth was great. i didn't get alot of things done tho' cos' i fell ill and had to stay in bed. but i like that. i miss my bed! haven't slept in it for like almost 2 years now. sigh! read Life Of Pi, while i'm there. awesome book. shud pick it up.

common tests are on next week. i dunno, i'm kinda slacking now. i dun feel v. stressed out. just slightly afraid i dun perform well for econs. i dun wanna be letting miss leong down! she's a great teacher. not like a certain civics tutor! i dunno. sometimes i feel compelled to do well for a certain subject because the tutor is extra nice and special! someone you'd not want to dissapoint.

life sometimes takes a different turn than you'd expect it to be. at times, i wonder where i am. what i've been doing. why i'm here. wquestions ringing, echoing deep in my head. voices whispering in me with fear. where will i be tomorrow? will the world come to an end? war. why is it that we have to settle for war and not diplomacy. losing of patience? utter nonsense. such ultimatums shud not be given out at all. ridiculous! i dun totally disagree with the justification that he is dangerous. but wat the hell? oh well. things happen for a reason rite? and we'll know it sooner or later! just like my life. i never really know what the hell is going on. people questioning me. i'm questioning myself. who am i? what am i? do i fit in? ever? sigh. we'll never know!

"How can you look into my eyes
like open doors.
leading you down into my core
where i've become so numb!"
~ Evanescence